I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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