Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
how does that bad decision feel?
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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