He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Randomize
