we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
