We're like a lot better than the average bears
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
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