Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Randomize
