I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize