we're chasing vodka with high fives
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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