I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
