oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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