Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Randomize
