Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
