Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
the day after is always just damage control
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
