Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize