the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
