it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize