Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Randomize
