I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
if i can run in heels then i can drive
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
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