Having a random hookup so left but love u
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
