...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
