OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
