I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
