If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
