when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize