whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
