Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Randomize
