you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Randomize
