The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
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