Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
