I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
