White coat. Heels.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
