there's paper in my vomit.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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