haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
