Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
i now understand why vodka
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
