Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Bring me that man meat
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
