Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you donโt have to recycle anymore ๐๐
Iโm also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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