Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
I'm having to shit out rocks
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