She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize