did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
