I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
