Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Randomize
