Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
