i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
