just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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