Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
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