I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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