I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize