You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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