office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
