But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize
